I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize