Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
