She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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