Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
