i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
please don't ironically join a cult
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