U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize