You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
This is the prime rib incident all over again
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
