All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
