Me too!
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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