Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
