Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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