I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
