hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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