So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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