My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
party gras won. party gras always wins.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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