What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
