awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize