So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
40s are totally the cure
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
