WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
His hands were made for my vagina.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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