this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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