I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Who died my cat blue again?
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
