Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize