one might say we're banned from that church
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
