3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
