The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
