If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Randomize
