It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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