Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
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