Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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