We should be called the Road Head Warriors
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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