Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
