we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
