So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
