I accidentally had phone sex last night
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
