You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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