Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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