CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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