what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
