I'm really into asian looking animals
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
