its not stalking. its research.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
