Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Randomize
