uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize