umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Randomize
