she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
It's shark week go big or go home
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Randomize