at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize
