Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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