i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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