You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I have fence marks all over my body
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
