sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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