she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
