Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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