It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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