If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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