escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
