My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
BRING THE BAGELS
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
